Well, I do let my boundaries slip sometimes and then I pay for it.
I’m in Seattle and am having a pretty bad flare. I had two weeks of getting off any kind of stretching or strengthening routine. This is new for me to do and not easy. I’ve had to take two hydros today.
What I know works that I let slip: minimal coffee, minimal alcohol, daily stretching, Foundation strengthening, watching how I sit, yoga, a better seat while I’m driving. I let all of that slide.
I had a lot of driving. Seattle two weeks ago. Canada last weekend. Moscow this week. Seattle this weekend. Too much driving and sitting.
So I have the combo of my bladder is getting hot and flared up and then too much sitting plus not staying fully up on the stretching. Just a bummer.
I’m trying to not panic at least. I talked to Kay about my life and what I’m here to learn. Empathy. Not being in control.
This won’t last forever and it’s yet another reminder to take care of myself and stay in my boundaries. Please Piper also remember and never, ever forget what it feels like to be in intense pain. Scary, exhausting, so exhausting, isolating, disorienting, confusing, draining. You miss out on conversations because you’re so distracted by the pain.
In fact, it’d be interesting to do a show or podcast episode on people living with pain.
Anyway, I am learning.
Tonight I met one of Jay’s cousins and her son. She was nicer than I thought she’d be knowing her Dad. I felt bad I’d made such a big deal of having boundaries with all this family. I just have negative connotations about family. I think they’ll want to suck me in or something. I want Jay to coordinate and manage it all and he is. So I can take my defenses down.
Anyway, help me relax, help me be okay with what’s happening and breathe and live.