When things suck, laugh about it.
Why don't I do that more?
Went to hear David Sedaris tonight at the bookstore. It was packed, and he was funny. I am always a little uncomfortable at times with his humor. He makes a lot of fun of his family. How are they with it all? I wonder. I don't think I could be as ruthless as he is. I've also heard he takes creative liberties. He also just seems mean at times. Maybe I'm the only one. I prefer to laugh without my conscience twinging. I hardly need more things to worry about.
The latest book is a compilation of diary entries from 1977-2003 or something like that. He used a lot of drugs when he was younger so that’s boring. Yawn, yawn, meth, meth, coke, pot, yawn.
But he has to write in his diary. Every. Single. Day. It’s not optional to not do it. That struck a chord. It made me feel less crazy. When I went through the book signing line, we talked about diaries for a long time. I think he really gets off chatting with people which is pretty crazy.
So I cooked this morning, and by cook, I mean I took meat from the fridge I had bought yesterday, cut it up, put some Svedeg spices on it, cooked it, then put it in the fridge for dinner tonight. This was a huge step for me in my new breakout life of being not-depressed. I enjoyed the smells in the kitchen of real food cooking and then snacking on it this evening. Wow…
So the diary event was a good one. He made a comment that reminded me of my lunch today. We went to Indian Canyon and sat on the patio and ate lunch. We took our new manager w/ us. He was very complimentary about us and the opportunity to work together. He said he’s whistling again. That made me happy. We need to get these other people out of the office and get back down to business.
At the golf course, I was reminded of my dad. There were a lot of golf balls flying around, the whack sound that a club make hitting a ball, etc. I imagine there are photos all over their building that might have my dad in them. That was curious, to be somewhere my dad has been at a lot and not have spent any significant amount of time there or even thought to.
PTSD, sexual abuse and trauma just messed up your life. Yeah, I'm changing. But once in a while, I realize I'm living a largely different life as a result of all this.
Whack. Another golf ball.
****
And back to humor, last night I watched the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt on Netflix. Is Titus the funniest character created in the last decade??
Next thing you'll know, I'll start watching stand-up. And going to comedy clubs. Oh wait, doing both.
I'm not sure why I have stayed so serious, even when I'm supposedly relaxing.
It will be nice for my brain to unfold and unwind. Kay will be happy to hear I'm following orders to be more relaxed and playful.
*****
On another note, surviving this week of more employee departures so far, mainly by avoiding the office and said above activites. Work is still sort of hell right now. The other two employees are leaving Friday. I’m having a massage, lunch w/ a friend and then a finance meeting to sort of prepare for the 'party' for them to leave tomorrow. It’s almost more than I can handle but it’ll be okay, it’ll get done.
#success