I am starting to feel more hopeful about our house.
The experience of designing the furniture and art for our new office space has given me real confidence to tackle the house. I’m on a tight budget and don’t want to get too much new stuff, but some paint and changing some furniture, lights and bedding could be a huge lift. I also realized it’d be super smart to go to Seattle and get used stuff over there. I literally can’t believe what prices are in Seattle for what you get used. The city is awash literally in brand new, modern used furniture that people are selling for pennies on the dollar.
So it feels good to be hopeful about the house and now just trying to not be overwhelmed. What worked well at the office was doing things in small stages, checking to see how things look then taking the next step. That would be good to do here as well.
I have a few pieces of furniture and art we’ll keep then work around those from a focal point and design perspective. The wood flooring also has an impact. We’ll see what happens!
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We had a good talk this weekend about Mary Oliver and the interview she did with Maria Shriver a few years ago. Jay was touched by it, that you can have this destructive childhood and still make beauty out of your life. He felt it was a victory story. I feel it’s a salvation story. I can relate the horror of feeling you just might not make it in life due to things that have been done to you. Not even choices you can regret and realize you made your own bed. Just being the victim. So yeah, it was cool we connected on that.
He also mentioned he felt it was significant that even later in life, she was still exploring herself and healing. In this interview, it was the first time she’d said out loud that she was a victim of childhood sexual abuse. There is hope for our entire lives. There seems to be messages in our culture that if you don’t make it big and early, you’re a fuck up. What a complete lie.
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We had dinner w/ friends at their house, then headed to the symphony. Tonight was Rachmoninoff, Dvorak and another composer present in the evening actually.
I tried to concentrate more this evening and realized I often have been preoccupied with other thoughts when I go to something like this. The last few years, I’ve been aware of pain, that’s for sure. I realized some of these I’ve seen, I don’t even remember. Pain and pain meds and stress do that to you… what memory??