My pelvic flare has finally, mostly subsided.
I think it's possible Jay is just tired of listening to me talk about pain and my body. I am, so can't imagine how he feels. Compassion fatigue; it's a thing.
Today saw both the acupuncturist and chiro. The chiro did this adjustment of my spine through my stomach? She had to sort of move my intestines aside to do this adjustment where she pushed down while releasing the table as well. It was trippy. Then she worked on my mouth a ton to help w/ the TMJ stuff. I'm tired.
*****
Tonight I met with a friend who's daughter wants to mainly dress like a boy. She likes boy clothes, boy toys, etc. I have another friend who has the same situation, though her son is a interested in dresses and is very artistic.
Think about that, and how that will be received by almost any group you would find yourself in as a parent: school, church, sports club or team, hobby group, camps, scouting, family, etc. Most will be very into girl power for the little girl and freaked out at the little boy.
We talked about the extremes our society currently functions in. Neither are healthy. One is hyperaccepting of anything and not wanting any boundaries or even common sense. The other is immersed in shaming rules and oppressive beliefs about sexuality, gender, relationships, etc.
I feel like families and parents are undersiege often and it's just freaking hard to parent in this culture. You're often alone, isolated from your extended family, if you have any or speak to them. Community in sort of that warm and earthy sense doesn't exist easily or naturally. Our life systems push us toward isolation and specialization, not generalization around being together and close with people.
*****
I lost my sunglasses then Jay found them. I had left them in the den on the desk. They are kind of expensive, and I've worked hard to not lose them. It was a weird up/down emotion.
I talked to El this evening for a long time. She's had a super rough reentry after her long trip to Cali. She had too much stress on the trip in addition to just traveling itself. She holed up last weekend and rested, rejuvenated.
I don't worry about her too much, but when I hear things like that, it makes me sad that she's having a rough time. I wish I knew if I could help but I think she has to figure it out on her own. I am trying to just be present and loving, not helpful per se. People want to be heard, not saved. I keep trying to remember that, especially with the kids.
I keep learning and hopefully growing. I'm surprised how slow it is. It reminds me of weight loss. It's so easy to gain back the weight it took months to shed. Growth feels like a lot of effort with small steps forward.
Worth it.