I've been some kind of seer my whole life.
What I've always seen is the energy behind whatever appears to be happening. I was angry that my mother always cooked even though she and my Dad both worked full-time. I understood the kitchen was about power and women always lost.
I understood why it was so toxic to only have men speaking in churches. I understood why we should we watching nature and not just listening to each other. I understood that the stories of the Bible were much deeper than the stories I was hearing. I felt and still feel all of that today. I don't know what that makes me other than a seeker and a heretic often at times. Probably a mystic. Finally though, I am finding a tribe.
The whole series this week from the CAC is on the Eurcharist. Rohr breaks down what communion was supposed to be about, a radical, final event before his passing that communicated as strongly as possible what Jesus' whole life had been about: being together, eating, in relationship with each other, no social boundaries, thankfulness, partaking in life and being present with each other in that, expanding the familial boundaries to include all and the other, feeling love, being loved, expanding and accepting.
These are the stories behind the stories about the Eucharist being about purity, asking forgiveness, not partaking if you're not worthy. None of this was meant to be part of this event, but that's what it has become.
My instincts are true. My desire to bring our neighborhood together, to eat together and have common meals, these are true thoughts. We need to break down even the small boundaries we all have here on a block where we are all the same race, have similar economic backgrounds, livelihoods, nationality.
If we cannot do it here, how could we do it anywhere else?
And on this, we go tonight to hang out with our small group of friends, refugees from our church experiences but still hanging onto the belief that God is in everything. We believe God exists assuredly in relationship, between creation, in things, in us.
So even though it is tempting to sit at home and read more books on whatever we believe is important, we get together instead. I work to make that happen not because I'm maternal but because it's right and needed.