I'm fully embracing, albeit with surprise, this season of autumn.
A dance is occurring here in late October between the vibrantly-colored trees and the electric blue sun. They are like long-lost lovers, trying to make up for time spent apart. I sense we are all holding our breath, wondering how long it will last.
The conditions feel rare, as if we haven't had an autumn like this for a very long time. Often it seems as if fall is a background topic in casual conversation, like we're a bit surprised by the slow but underwhelming change of color in the trees each fall.
But not this year.
This year, autumn is The Topic right now, and I do love it when Mother Nature wrenches back her rightful place of respect and awe.
While nature is putting on a show, many things are happening as I move through therapy. I am waking up. I feel like I'm waking up from decades of hypervigilance so that's more of a thaw. The waking up part is coming out of the depression that's lasted the last several years.
I'm also growing at the same time, so transitioning from being in my first half of life to the second.
I'm feeling emotions about new things. I'm excited to go outside and explore what is happening, to observe how different this year is than the last, to notice the migrating ducks at the pond, to listen to their unique calls, to pick up leaves.
So all in all, there is a deep sense of calm and peacefulness that covers a lot of my thoughts these days.
I think very little about what to buy next. Instead, I wonder about songs and music that specific to this season. I dig out my giant poetry anthology and low and behold, a section on autumnal poems.
I find the Seasons symphony by Tschikowsky and listen to the Autumn section. I'm not sure it resonates with what I'm experiencing, but I am thrilled to even have an opinion.
All in all, I feel like I'm being reborn into a life that already has a foundation of goodness.