I've traveled a very strange, windy road out of adrenal fatigue and depression.
I wish I'd known where I was going.
I mainly knew I had to leave much of what was familiar behind. I knew traditional therapy didn't work. I knew I was close to being in bed all day. I knew my key relationships were suffering. In the traditional sense of life, I knew I was dying.
As a result, I did what I usually do when facing a big project of any kind, I made lists. I made lists and a matrix of options that covered various parts of health: creativity, mental, physical, spirit, body, work. I broke those down further: doctors, exercise, relaxation, writing, art, poetry, classes, sexuality, people, nature, doctors, food. And I just started working through the obvious, the things I knew were broken and started looking for help, taking tiny steps forward.
One of the first things I did was take the psych evaluations you can do. Our health insurance allows for that through their Behavior Health Center. I met with a psychiatrist, explained my symptoms and took two tests that took about two hours total.
About a month later, I got back the results. I had generalized anxiety, depression, and PTSD. I drifted slightly into histrionics, hysteria and a few other wonderful things. That was it. I started taking a mild anti-depressant, he said to stay in trauma therapy and a few other basics.
So that was a baseline. I didn't know much about each of these things. What are they? What do they mean? Histrionics especially intrigued me.
The doctor indicated that people with this tendency don't ask for help. They are very strong. They weather almost anything, but they are hurting. So they tend to go to the medical community to get the support they aren't getting and need. They frequently have ailments or get help for things they maybe could do themselves.
That really fit. I have had significant health issues, many related to long-term chronic stress. I've had good luck w/ most of my doctors and feel cared for when I get help and relief. I'm also pretty proactive about alternative therapies so have developed a retinue of helpers and healers that have kept me functioning.
I'm seeing now though, that seeking out someone else's help is my go-to approach. A doctor, massage, another acupuncture visit, urgent care, medicines. Now, I'm finding that when issues arise, I am trying to help myself first. Stretching, exercise, essential oils, meditation. I am taking better care of my body, myself. I am preventing injuries. I am taking care of ones that are minor. I'm feeling more confident in my own ability to care for myself and save time with the doctor for when it's really needed.
In short, I'm getting better. I'm more in control of my health, mental and physical. I am strong enough, skilled and trained enough, to be able to do this.
I didn't expect this to be an outcome from my psych exams but it has been.
Go figure!
And hallelujah.